On the Eve of Your Graduation

On what should be the eve of your graduation from high school, I sit here alone and think of all the things that will never be. I am honoured that Yale Secondary is allowing me to attend the ceremony and that your memory will be alive and your life will be honoured. However, I am overcome with sadness and a void that cannot be filled. This is truly the last event of your life that I know you would have accomplished. We cannot say that you would have been married, so I cannot mourn that. We cannot say you would have had children, so I cannot mourn that. This is the last event that I needed to be a part of for you. So that you can be there and so that your friends and peers know that you will be with them all tomorrow. How I wish you were here. How I wish that I could see you walk across the stage and accept your Dogwood. So many wishes that will never come true. It seems that I have been waiting for tomorrow to arrive since you left. I have known that this is the last secondary loss that has caused me so much angst waiting for this month to arrive. What happens after tomorrow? You cannot go on with your life and yet everyone else will. Your friends and peers are planning their future. You have no future. Tomorrow is a huge loss for me….again. It is like losing you all over again. I have no more events or accomplishments of yours to look forward to. You are truly gone. Although I think of you each and every day, each and every hour, the world moving on without you seems as if you will be forgotten. I will do everything to ensure that you are not forgotten; however, for now I am so very heartbroken that your life has come to an end both physically and in the milestones you should have been here for. I am so very proud of you. You will do great things. I love you Monkey and I miss you more and more each day.